Baby Animals Days

  

The American West Heritage Center does Baby Animal Days every year. They bring a ton of baby farm animals and let little kids hold and pet them. This year is was snowing during the big event, but I found out they had a few stray Saturdays during April, so Anne and I went together. She was very amused by the little ducks, chicks and lambs, but didn't really care about the calves or pigs. She wasn't interested in the bunnies either, but I forced her to feel one and then she was ok with it.

It was VERY muddy, and she fell down a few times. She would put her hands out to me saying, "Mess! Mess! She wouldn't just wipe her hands off on the grass or hay; I had to wipe them spotless with wipes. She is such a girl.

Return to Patrick's Mission

As every return missionary knows, you always think about when you can go back. You just can't help but wonder if everything matches the chrystal clear memories you have in your mind. Will the smells, streets, food, people, bus routes, etc. be the same? I was lucky enough to go back to Argentina while Patrick was in Iraq, but we finally made the trip back to Houston were Patrick served among the Vietnemese people. I hadn't really pushed it earlier because Patrick never made Houston itself sound very interesting; He only remembers it as miserably humid and very ghetto. And, I "knew" it would just be a week of me sitting on random people's couches for hours and hours trying to keep Anne from destroying their homes and not understanding any of their Asian gibberish. But we wanted to take a trip to a warm place and I figured I may as well "get it out of the way" because it would never be easier or cheaper than now. So we planned it. And it was a blast!!!

The start was a little rocky. We piggy backed off the weekend Patrick had to be to drill in SLC valley and stayed with my Uncle Charles and Aunt Diane for the weekend. We flew out at 6am Monday which means we had to wake Anne up at 4am. When I was booking the flights, I was so worried about landing in time for her nap that I didn't really think it all the way through. Anne was a pretty good sport though for a tired 22-month-old. She colored and looked out the window on the planes and pushed the stroller around the airport during our layover. She got a broken 45 minutes of sleep and I thought that was fine but hoped to get to our hotel room for a proper nap. However, what I had thought was just hay fever now had my sinuses hurting so bad I knew it had to be a sinus infection. Great. Jut once I would like to have a family vacation that didn't start with Anne or I going to an urgent care for a sinus infection. After about 3 hours wait, the doctor loaded me up with steroids and antibiotics and gave Anne a little chocolate because whe was reaching her melting point.

 We spent our first 2 nights in Galveston. Loved it!!!! I highly recommend it to everyone. We stayed in a 4 star hotel 2 block from the beach for $47 per night!!! Awesome! Anne saw the pool as we were checking and had her face plastered to the window saying "water, water, water." We figured she had put up with us all day so we humored her and spend an hour in the hot tub before bed.

Tuesday morning we walked along the beach and just enjoyed the smells and warm humid air. Galveston has a perfect blend of Caribbean, Mexican, American Western and Victorian styles. The water was more like California water as opposed to the clear Jamaican blue, but the beaches were very nice. Anne zonked in the stroller about 10am so we carried her back to the hotel. She is such a sweet kissable sleeping baby girl.

Soan (Swang) and An (ung) met us at the hotel just as Anne was waking up from her nap, so we went to lunch together.  I had the best beef fajita I ever, and it was modestly priced, too. An was the president of the Viet branch the whole time Patrick was serving. Soan fed Patrick and his companion a lot; Patrick claims he got so big because he was victim of her delicious cooking. : ) I met them at our wedding and another breif time before, but it was nice to really talk with them. We spent a little over an hour in the pool for Anne's sake after lunch. An slept by the pool and Soan just oogled over Anne. How can you not? She's so adorable. After we changed, we went through an old WWII ship and submarine. Anne was crazy over the stairs, and we could hardly keep her away from them long enough to enjoy the ship. She also started this think where she walks with her hand on her hip. Do I do that? She also kept saying, "Good girl! Good girl!" if we ever slacked on praising her at anytime. She definately does not have a self-esteem problem.

 

There was no formal tour, just a few plaques next to door ways with a brief explanation of who used the rooms. We wished there had been more info about the specific ships' histories. We kept thinking it would be so fun to have my dad or Uncle Charles here to share their knowledge. The most interesting part to me was the bathroom and sleeping . . . .  situation. I don't have pictures but everyone had to be up close and personal at all times. There are definatley reasons why woman are only allowed in certain areas of the military.

We had dinner in the historical district of Galveston. It was so awesome. We walked around an old school icecream parlor/candy store. Anne was really excited too, and in a mad dash away from us, she smacked straight into the corner of a table and had a very nice bruise on her cheek. We had dinner outside on a patio. It was awesome to be outside and 7pm with no jacket and the breeze was delicious. Loved it!

Wednesday was checkout day, despite the debate of whether or not we should ask for another night. We figured it would leave Patrick too short to do what he wanted to in Houston. So, we packed and then spent as much time as possible in the hot tub per Anne's request. She is definately a water baby but the ocean waves scare her. After checking out, we drove around the island seeing what we could see. We saw some georgeous beach front lots for only $10k. The houses were really beautiful.  

  After we got to Soan and An's house, we went for a walk around the neighborhood. I love the humidity and it was so warm.  Soan made us dinner and Anne ate four bowls. She loves vietnemese food. She did learn to say "spicey" though, instead of hot. It is so cute!

I could visit Houston in March any year. Houston is a very nice place. It wasn't as awesome as Galveston, but the weather and vegetation reminded me of Buenos Aires. When you consider it is the 4th largest city in the US, is it very clean and well kept. I also learned the cost of living is pretty cheap. Homes are only a little higher than Logan, food was much cheaper, and employment opportunities are exponentially better and greater in number.

 Thursday we took Anne to the aquarium. She loves Finding Nemo so we knew she would like it.  One of the first tanks had two Nemos and a Dori, so she made us sit there for about 45 minutes watching those little fish. She made sure everyone knew who they were looking at. There were other cool sea creatures, including an octopus that was seriously showing off his stuff, but he couldn't hold a candle to "Dowi." After she finally let us pull her away from Nemo, she became mesmerized by a Macaw they had. She sat and stared at him for about another 30 minutes. 

Anne played in the water at the aquarium and got pretty wet. Her shirt dried before we were ready to go, so she just hung around in her diaper and shirt. We went to the mall in China town for Patrick's favorite food, Pho (fu). It was Anne's first non-milk food when she was a baby and she loves it. At the mall we decided to buy her an Ao dai (ow ya-I), the Viet traditional dress. Everyone in the mall thought she was adorable. Because she was!

Friday we visited a lady who Patrick contacted and was baptised while he was on the mission. She greeted us warmly and brought us bottled water and cookies in her pretty sitting room. It was practically deja vu. She and Patrick chattered for over an hour, and I was suprised at how much I could follow. Anne played with the daughter on the stairs. There was a time when the little Viet girl said something to Anne and Anne stared blankly like, "What did you just say to me? All I hear is oon bach duke da." Anne finally just nodded her head yes. I almost died!

 

 That evening we went to the Budist temple for some sort of Spring prayer festival. Patrick calls it "idolitry at its best." There were huge statues and flea market/fair booths everywhere. It stunk of incense; I never have like the smell of that stuff. But it was very colorful and the drums were cool. When ever patrick started speaking Viet, the Asians initially would always laugh because they were so surprised. Then they were impressed by how well he spoke. I guess a brawly white guy isn't the most likely Viet translator. We ate Pho for dinner, and Anne ate a whole bowl by herself. If any one as had a bowl, you know a bowl is pretty dang big. The Vietes all got a kick out of how much a little white girl could eat.

We went boot shopping Saturday morning for Patrick, and then after Anne's nap we had lunch with the old ward mission leader who is now inactive. We had dinner at an awesome steak house with Soan and An and The Molines, a couple who served a stake mission while Patrick was there. You know the food is going to be good when the restaurant owner is willing to pay you $1000 if you can find a better steak for the price anywhere, and they take you back into the kitchen to pick your own steak. Anne was obsessed with the moose head and bear they had. She kept pointing and saying, "moose. Bear, Roar! Bear. Moose. Roar!" She still mentions the moose and Bear, she was so impressed.

On Sunday we went to the Viet Branch. Everyone there remembered Patrick and he was very happy to see it is muh bigger than when he left. He said it was all more fullfilling than he had even hoped it would be. It was so fun to see the people and places that Patrick loves so much and remembers so fondly. We flew out at 7pm Sunday and didn't get back to Logan until 2:30am. We had to do the later flight to make it to the 12:30-3:30pm church block and still get us home in time for Patrick to head to North Dakota again Monday morning. It was a very long night so the trip didn't exactly end with a bang, but luckily you only remember the good parts of the past. It was a great trip.

Unforgettable moments

Patrick is driving a big water truck in North Dakota for the oil wells. He is gone 16 days and home 12. Anne and I decided to have a little mother/daughter date and we went to our favorite Mexican Restaurant here in town, Cafe Sabor. The salsa there is SOOOO yummy. I can practically drink it, and Anne loves it as well. Anne is usually very good with the tortilla chips, but this trip she got a little over confident and started putting them whole into her mouth. Obviously she started choking and then puking. I was rubbing her back and keeping her calm, while holding my hand cupped in front of her mouth to catch whatever I could. As she recovered, she looked at me with her red puffy eyes and said, "Thank you, Mom."

I normally go to the gym after Anne is asleep and Patrick is home, but with Patrick gone that is no longer possible. So, I have been trying to do at least one workout video per day. Anne is usually good to let me do it; she just likes to help and sometimes she will even do it to . . .well her interpretation of what I am doing. However, Anne has become absolutely OBSESSED with Lion King. She can watch that movie 100 times a day every day. She is constantly shoving the case at me saying, "Roar! Roar!" The other day I put in a workout DVD and was determined to do the whole thing because I had missed a few days in a row. But when Anne realized it was not Lion King, she threw a FIT! She was rolling around the bed, flailing her arms and screaming at the top of her lungs. She did time out a couple times in a row since we do not tolerate temper tantrums, but she was as determined as I was. I finally lost my temper and yelled at her, "Anne, I am going to do my workout video!" She got very sad with the real alligator tears and softly said, "Sorry, Mom." Ohhhhhh! I felt so bad for yelling and she was so sorrowful that I decided I could do lunges and squats while she watched "Roar." After I got my 30 minutes in and a shower, I laid beside her on the bed. She put her little chubby hand on my bicep and gently patted and squeezed it until the movie was finished. I'm in love!

                                                                    

Anne loves strawberry yogurt! She can eat six per day. That is no exaggeration. I'm sure the fact that she can get it out of the fridge, reach the spoons and take the top off by herself is part of the appeal. But whatever it is, she likes them. One morning as I was changing her diaper, she kept asking for "strawberry. Strawberry." That is a very normal breakfast request, except she was reaching down where the diapers are in the changing table. She was also trying to take off her pjs. I did not fully understand this request, so I asked her to show me. She started digging through her pj drawer, picking one up, and in frustration putting it back. She did this a few times, leaving me more confused as to what she wanted. Finally she pulled out her pink pjs and handed it to me in satisfaction. I guess she wanted to wear her strawberry colored pjs that day. Ok!

Today is absolutely gorgeous! It was 42 degrees at 9:00am so it was very  warm by the end of church. After lunch, Anne and I did a little barefoot stroll around the block before nap time. She was reluctant to come in, so I had to pick her up. She was very sad and she said, "sunshine. sunshine" as we headed into the house. I know exactly how she feels.

Anne

Anne is crazy! She goes through out the house babbling and waving her hands about as if she is a baptist preacher. I'm not sure how she got so crazy. It's definitely not from me. She is so polite. She says "thank you" and "good job" after everything. I especially appreciate it when I'm cleaning up a rancid diaper. There are so many moments during everyday that I just have to grit my teeth and contain myself because she is so squishy and adorable that I have overwhelming urges to squish her and nibble on her. She is so tolerant of her father's and my floods of kisses. She continues on with her activity as though it were nothing. It is so fun to watch her attention to detail, her happy spirit, and how much she idolizes us (mostly her dad, but me some).

She LOVES her baby and is a very good mother. She rocks it, sings to it, pats it, gives it drinks, etc.+

CAPSA

So, I got a job giving financial counseling to the local domestic violence and rape victims going through the Transitional Housing program. It didn't last long but the training I attended was. . . .enlightening. I sat through four days of intense lectures and videos on rape and domestic violence. There are some pretty sick people out there. Anyway, as I listened to the lecturers and other volunteers' questions and comments, Ephesians 4:11-14 kept running through my mind.
"Doctrine" is often a tool abusers use to control or silence their victims, or even rationalize that it is ok. Eg: Elizabeth Smart. Now, obviously the "doctrine" is taken out of context, corrupted or just plain satanic. However, because of the naivity and/or lack of spiritual/scriptual knowledge, the victim "falls for it" for lack of a better word. I don't know what particular doctine is used, but I do know that "turning the other cheek" or "being Christian" doesn't mean being a push over, a sucker, weak, or defenseless. Christ had an absolute throw down, twice!, when something sacred was being corrupted (John 2:13-16). The prince of peace, said, "But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea." Matt 18:6. He also said in reference to the priesthood, ". . . . when we undertake to cover our sins, or to gratify our pride, our vain ambition, or to exercise control or dominion or compulsion upon the souls of the children of men, in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens withdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved; and when it is withdrawn, Amen to the priesthood or the authority of that man." D&C 121:37

I can go on and on about how evil rapist, batterers, and abusers are, especially when their victims are children, but I can't change them. Note: I did not say they can not control themselves. I pray we catch them early and that our judicial system will be wise. I loath pornography and anything that distorts and corrupts the roles and value of either gender. That includes stupid chick romance novels and feminism, but that is another soap box. So I focus on what I can do; what my friends can do to solve the problem. There are two ways bad people gain control: bad people forcing and good people standing by.

"Victims" have a part in avoiding abuse. Note: I did not say it was their fault, that they deserved or want to get beat or raped. I just mean they made choices that put them in such a vulnerable situations. (This does not apply to children because they don't really have true agency or understanding.) We have a responsibility to seak after and know truth. That way, we won't be "tossed to and fro, and caried about with every wind of doctine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive."
We need to make better choices in who, when, where and why we date. We need to be aware of our clothing, time of activities, personal information that we make public (facebook, texting, phone, etc). This does not certain behaviors and dress make you scum, it means they will probably attract it. Take a Rape Aggression Defense class so you know how to properly kick some ass. Make and keep good friends, participate in good, clean fun, develop healthy diet, exercise, and hygiene. Have hobbies and goals.You have to do those things that keep you in control of your life and full of happiness. If you have made poor choices, fix it! Stop it!

We also need to really teach the doctrine to our children. Even if they aren't being fed a bunch of false doctrine, Truth can help them shout no, tell someone, fight back. 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 5 boys will be sexually abused before they are 18. That is only sexual abuse, not physical. And, if the mother was abused, her daughters are 50% more likely to be. That sucks! These statistics have been quoted for years and years and the best explanation I can come up with is we are creating generational abusers and victims. We are not arming ourselves enough. FYI: Day care is not the most dangerous place for children. Their home is. 60%+ of sexual abuse happens at sleep overs (friends, brothers, fathers, family friends, etc). Women are the number one killer of children. Yes, we do need to be VERY mindful of who we leave our children with. But we especially need to have our eyes "wider" when choosing who we date, who we marry, and who we invite into our home.

In the training I was in, one of the volunteers shared her experience in trying to teach her children. She started warning them of pornagraphy at age 5, talked about "good touch, bad touch," etc. One time they were at families' house and all the children were playing over the hill. Soon her children came screeming over the hill with fists full of porn. Appearantly there was a neighborhood porn cave and her children weren't going to have any of it. Yeah! Well, a few years later, she had a nephew (if I can remember right) over and while she was folding laundry (10 minutes top), the nephew got her daughter. And they were in the very next room. She had done everything right! And her daughter still got raped. The therapist explained it that when someone desides to abuse, they will do it, and they just need a window of opportunity.

This was pretty discouraging. This mom had done everything right. So, does this mean I need to completely shut my kids off from the world!? I just concluded that if something happens to my child(ren), it won't be because I didn't put up a hell of a fight. I found more hope when a friend told me her mom picked her up unexpectedly from a sleepover before the night had even really begun. My friend was so embarrassed and angry but her mom just told her she did not feel right about it. It soon came out that the father of the home got into bed with the girls that night and abused them. Heavenly Father loves his babies! And that mother didn't shrug off or rationalize a gut feeling. We need to be doing everything we can to have all of His aid. We need to study doctrine, not just to have the scriptural knowledge, but to have the Spirit to teach us when what we need to know has never been written down. As parents it is sooooo important to be aware and never second guess any promptings or gut feelings.

Hot and Cold game

I am the primary pianist for our ward here in Logan and I must say it is quite an idyllic calling. There is no prep, no meetings, no quarterly reports, etc but I am most definitely missed when I am not there. I get to hear a lesson, feel the spirit in addition to adequate "wiggle" time. I love it. One of the kids' favorite singing time games is "the bug game." I always knew it as Hot and Cold." Two children are selected - one is to go out in to the hall and wait while the other hides the plastic insect in an obscure place. Then the child returns from the hall and tries to find the bug while the primary sings the selected song over and over getting louder and softer according to the child's proximity to the bug. Some children really understand the game and find it really quickly. Most of the children, however, just run to the popular hiding places despite the volume in the room. A few children just stand in one central spot trying to see the bug while disabling the aid of the "choir." This game is a lot like life decisions and the Holy Ghost. I have been thinking a lot about this during this phase in our life - trying to decide which medical school to choose, how to pay for it, what job to take, etc. My anxiety level was getting very high around Thanksgiving to the point where I had a constant "IV drip" of adrenaline in my system. As I shared my feeling with my in-laws during the break, my father-in-law matter-a-fact-ly stated, "you just aren't having enough faith." I wasn't defensive and thought about it a minute and concluded, "No, that's not it. I have perfect faith that Heavenly Father will guide us. I trust perfectly in whatever he wants for us, even if it isn't medical school at all." So why was I so stressed out? As I played the piano during the "Hot and Cold" game in primary the next Sunday, I realized I lacked the faith that I would recognize His guiding! I then thought of the scripture in D&C 6:14 ". . .for thou hast inquired of me, and behold, as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. If it had not been so, thou wouldst not have come to the place where thou art at this time." In other words, I have recognized his promptings every other time, or else how would I have ended up with such an awesome husband, major, home, financial independence, etc. I took faith that Patrick and I do make awesome decisions together! Life choices are just like the game of "hot and cold." You just have to start moving while listening intently to the spirit and staying or moving toward the place it is the loudest.
I shared this experience in Fast and Testimony meeting and the children must have listened because all of a sudden the game got much better. The bug is now put in REALLY hard, non-visible places and it is still usually found before the first verse is up. (The junior primary is a little slower, but still a big improvement.) That is just an example that children need to be properly instructed in what to listen for and once they get it, they got it! Children can learn early to follow the spirit.